Imagine stepping into your future self's shoes today. How would it transform your life? In our chat today, I'm bringing the "be her now" philosophy to wellness. I've been seeing it everywhere in the online business world, but it has such a powerful message that you need to hear! This transformative approach involves adopting the habits and behaviors of our ideal selves, even before we've fully become them. We discuss my personal voyage with this method and the ways it's already impacted me. Enjoy!
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Welcome to Keeping Balance, the podcast that brings the lived experiences of our health and fitness journeys to the forefront as we dive deep into the many nuances of what wellness and balance is. I'm your host, courtney Bibilia, a fitness nurse, business owner and mom of two, and if you want to feel heard and gain wisdom on your path to aligning physical fitness with mental health and joy as a woman, then you're in the right place. Hello, hello everyone. Welcome back to the Keeping Balance podcast. Today we are going to be talking about the concept of being her now, which is this trendy topic that I've been hearing all over the entrepreneurial space. But I want to bring this conversation into the health and wellness space because I think it's a really powerful sentiment that is free and super easy to start implementing today, to start feeling better immediately. So let me back up and explain a little bit being her now. I don't know if you've heard of it, but if you're in the entrepreneurial world, there is a lot of talk about manifestation and you make your vision boards, you say your affirmations and you sort of embody this energy that you want to emulate. For a lot of people, it has to do with money or a specific lifestyle that comes with reaching a certain income level in your business. So I see a lot of people talking about manifesting this luxury lifestyle. You want the car, you want the house, you want all of these fancy things that you want to do in your dream world. And this conversation of manifestation in the entrepreneurial space is basically saying, like there's no reason why you can't be her now, even if you don't have those physical things in your possession right now. There's no reason why you cannot embody that energy. And a lot of people phrase it as rising to the vibration of that energy, right, like rising up and sort of becoming that version of yourself in the way that you think before you're actually there. This is similar to the concept of act before you're ready. People have these things they want to do. A lot of us tend to wait until we've reached some certain point in our lives to do it, or we think we have to wait, but the problem is that that point never comes, or even if it does sort of come, there's a caveat to it or another circumstance that has popped up where we're like OK, well, now we have to wait until this happens. The perfect time to do something never arises the perfect time to do something is when you decide to do it right. So it's very similar to this concept of behaving like the person that you want to become. So for a lot of people in business who are in online business coaching, where their income essentially isn't really capped, like as hard as you work, is the amount of money you can make, that kind of looks like. When you wake up in the morning, you already start to think like that person who has that level of income. So what are the things that she does? How does she talk to herself? What is the first thing that she does in the morning? Is she someone who immediately and anxiously grabs her phone and starts scrolling through social media and checks emails and is replying to people frantically before she even gets out of bed? Or is she someone who is calm and collected and she gets up at a certain time and she does certain things? Ok, that's just one example. She X amount of times a week Does she go to Pilates, yoga, weightlifting, whatever. What are those things that she does on an hourly, daily, weekly, monthly basis? And then, what are ways that you can start emulating that? So, even if you're not driving your G-Wagon to Pilates. Maybe you're walking on your free feet, that you have to a YouTube video in your living room where you can do a workout Maybe it's a KPM workout, hala but can you see how we can start to apply this to health and wellness? And it's not. It doesn't have to be so frou-fou. You know, manifestation, universe, vibration, like all of those terms that a lot of the, a lot of people tend to recoil at. It doesn't have to feel like that. You can make it really concrete if you want to, and so this started to come up for me when, recently, we got here to Arizona, and I think this was definitely a sign or the universe coming in to interject and be like hello, we need to change something because, lo and behold, the outlet next to my nightstand in our bedroom doesn't work. It's the only outlet in the entire house that doesn't work, and so I wound up not being able to plug my phone in at night to charge it. I had to charge it somewhere else, and so in the meantime, I was starting to realize that there is a definite barrier that I can identify between that standing, between the version that I am today and the person that I see myself as in the future, that ideal version of myself that's kind of like abstract and far away and blurry, like I know she exists and I know the things that she does and I know who she is, but I'm not there yet. And then I started to ask myself, well, why not? What are those things that she's doing? Who is that version of you and how can you just start being her now? And then I was like, oh my gosh. So this barrier that I identified was the fact that I probably waste so much time and energy scrolling on my phone. Now, if you've been following me for a while, a few months ago I did the Sun Before Scroll Challenge, where I told everyone let's, for 30 days, see if we can go outside and get sunlight for at least five minutes before we turn on our screen light and start scrolling through our phones aimlessly. And for me, most of my work is done through my phone or through a computer, some kind of screen, and so it's necessary for me to spend time on my phone but not to aimlessly scroll. And so at first I was like, let's be more strategic about my scroll time and my phone time, like let's schedule out actual things that I need to accomplish and, beyond that, like there's no reason for me to be on there any bit longer. And when I did the scroll or Sun Before Scroll Challenge, I was able to do it for the 30 days and it felt amazing. But I think I do a lot better with out of sight, out of mind, because as soon as those 30 days were over, my phone was on my nightstand and I was like, okay, I'm not really addicted to my phone time in the morning, I can just check it because I need to for my emails or I need to see if I have any DMs. I didn't actually need to. So this sign from the universe with my outlet not working led me to actually having to charge my phone in a different room entirely overnight. And that has changed everything for me, because this ideal version of myself that lives in the future, she's someone who, at night, when the kids go to bed, she takes her shower and she does the various things she needs to do for her own self-care and hygiene, and she reads a book and she ties up the kitchen so that things are good to go for the morning. She's able to remember to take her magnesium at night, do her session of breathing or journaling or whatever, and for me, for the longest time, this seemed like a version of myself that could only exist if XYZ conditions were present, when the reality is that those conditions don't have to be present. I just have to decide to be her now. I just have to decide to do those things now, and so I committed to leaving my phone in a different room so it's out of sight and out of mind, so that I actually could do those things. And so for the past two weeks, I have been ending all of my nights with a shower, if I need to shower, doing a mobility routine on the TV in the living room and then going and reading books. I've finished in the past two weeks three or four books. I feel so much better and I'm actually learning something new that I can implement from these books, versus just scrolling social media and feeling just like an emotional roller coaster. So that by itself has been super powerful, and it's bled into the morning routine as well, because now that I'm not reaching my for my phone first thing, I can get up and actually wake up in a more relaxed state. I don't know if you do this, but when I would wake up. Before it was almost as if it was like a reflex where I had to just immediately reach for my phone, whether it was to check the time, which eventually led into more scrolling etc. But it was like a reflex and now I'm able to wake up a little more slowly and just kind of ease into my day a bit more, just in a better nervous system state. So now that my phone's in a different room, I found myself getting up in the morning and I'm doing my morning stuff and I don't even remember that my phone is a thing that exists. I don't even remember that scrolling is a thing that has to quote unquote, has to happen. So what are other ways that you can just decide to be her now? Right, be that person of yourself that you've seen the future. How can you be her now? What little different things can you just decide to do? Does the ideal version of you drink 100 ounces of water a day? And, by the way, this is an arbitrary number. What you should be aiming for, water wise, is half of your body weight in ounces. So that would be for a 200 pound person to aim for 100 ounces a day. So does this person, does this person actually do her laundry all in one day? Does this person put away her laundry the same day that she starts the dryer in the washer? Does the future version of you that you think you're going to become magically one day Does she stretch three times a week? Does she weight lift three times a week? Does she chart her cycle? What are those different things that the highest version of you does, and can you decide to be her now? Can you decide to just do one little thing that gets you closer to that ideal version, because there's nothing stopping you except for the decision that you have to make. There's nothing stopping you, and this does not have to be groundbreaking, this does not have to be all at once. These can be little, tiny things, and doing those little tiny things that you say you're going to do builds confidence over time. The more that you do to, in tiny increments, work towards the ideal version of yourself, the more confident in yourself you're going to become, the more that you're going to believe in yourself, that you are actually getting towards that person. And the only way that we're ever going to become that ideal person, our ideal version of ourselves, is one little day at a time. Okay. So I hope that resonates with you. I hope that makes sense. And so for me, besides the whole phone deal, certain things that I'm trying to just do now, to be her now, is things like remembering the water, not letting things pile up that get me overwhelmed, like the dishes piling up, like the laundry piling up things, like that. So it's those things that in our mind right now seem hard but we're not going to magically change unless we're actively working on changing that. And it's not as if being a certain age or having a certain income is going to magically make me change my behavior. It's still a choice that I have to make, with or without that circumstance that I'm putting on my goal right. So let's do one thing today where we can be her now and let me know DM me, email me, whatever you want to do, shoot me a message inside the KBM app and let me know one little thing that you're doing right now to be her now and we can keep this going. And then, if we ever do a challenge again, it's not going to be just a son before scroll challenge is going to be you're going to put your phone in a different whole ass room. All right. So lots of love. If you are listening for the first time, if you are listening for the 100th time there hasn't even been a hundred episodes I would greatly appreciate and send you virtual hugs and kisses If you were to leave a rating and or a review. Let everyone know what you think of this podcast and if you give it a thumbs up, then more people can hear conversations like this. And this is, of course, not directly related to women's cycles, women's fitness, but indirectly it really is, because at the end of the day, it's just a little bit of a challenge. Health and wellness is a mindset first, 100% a mindset and a decision. There are tons of things out of our control, but the one thing that we can control is the way that we think. It is the way that we talk to ourselves and it is the decisions that we make. Lots of love, you guys. Take care of yourselves. I'll talk to you next week. Hey, friends, before you go, I want to make sure you know that the Keeping Balance Method app is free to download from your app store and comes with seven free lessons to get you started on a sustainable fitness routine that gets results but feels incredible too. Just search Keeping Balance Method. Create your account for free, and if you're feeling fired up to start working out with your cycle, then my membership comes with a seven-day free trial so you can try everything from strength training to mobility, to hybrid classes that combine resistance training with cardio, and all of the KVM membership. Workouts are designed to be home-friendly and can be completed in 30 minutes or less, so that your workouts are fueling your day instead of depleting you. You're out there making the world a better place and you deserve workouts that help you live life to its fullest. Now go out there and have a beautiful day, whatever that looks like for you. Thanks for listening. Bye.